Are you self-sabotaging?

Self-sabotage is a bitch. We've all been down the slippery sabotage slope at one time or another. It shows its face in many different ways - but either way you slice it, it's toxicity infuses its way into our lives and leaves us feeling overwhelmed, resistant, and completely, totally stuck.

You start doubting yourself. I could never do that. I'm not qualified enough. Smart enough. Brave enough. Worthy enough.

You're terrified at the thought of failing - so why bother at all, right? I'll just look like an idiot, anyway.

You're afraid of your own power. You want change in your life, but this thought keeps ringing in your ear: Who am I if I am no longer THIS thing anymore?

You're swimming in information overload, frozen by all of your options and unable to move forward because you don't know enough yet to reach the next level.

The idea of change scares you more than staying right where we are. You retreat, pack it in, stay comfortable - because, hey, it's comfy.

You reach a new level of success and think, I'll never top that. Cue the creative blockage.

These patterns crop up time and time again, only to frustrate and let you down. Maybe self-sabotage has left you refusing to try something new because, hey, you never follow through anyway. Or maybe you just feel so stuck where you are right now that you can't imagine feeling unstuck.

Or maybe you're reading this and realizing for the first time that you don't need space, it's not the planetary alignments that left you feeling this way, it's actually self-sabotage.

What's next?

WHAT'S REALLY GOING ON?

You know when you're getting in your own way. Yes, it's possible to convince yourself of something entirely different, blaming someone else, coming up with excuse after excuse. BUT! When you get still and ask yourself point blank - you will not be able to hide behind the Story you've told.

The more awareness I bring to my life, the more I can act from a place of integrity and love. (Tweet this!) 

Sometimes that might look like grabbing a journal and processing my thoughts on paper, other times that looks like deep breathing and meditation.

You might ask, "What's really causing me to feel creatively blocked?"

Because why create when someone else could do it better. Why start when I have a habit of not finishing projects. Who do I think I am? I'm no expert. I don't have all of my shit together. What if it sucks anyway? What if nobody likes it? What if nobody likes me? It's easier to remain unseen. 

Oh, right then. There it is. The Stories that have been dancing in your mind.

That's the thing though, they're Stories. They are not necessarily true.

"The more important a call or action is to our soul’s evolution, the more Resistance we will feel toward pursuing it." | Steve Pressfield

LIBERATE YOURSELF

Once you can spot the sabotage... decide to get curious. Decide to create a life that feels free and is soul-nourishing.

There's a beautiful question I like to ask myself - "What would it feel like to let this (story/ pattern/ emotion) go?" and also "Am I ready to dissolve this?" A lot of the time it's habit and conditioning - feeling comfortable in the discomfort - that keeps us locked emotionally. 

When you're on the edge of your comfort zone... take three deep breathes and whisper to yourself, "I don't know what's going to happen, it's out of my hands. What I do know is that not moving forward means I stay exactly where I am. Being stagnant is worse than making an effort." 

When you come up against a creative block that's holding you back, when you call the guy back who you know isn't right for you, when you find yourself in the midst of drama, when you're waiting for something bad to happen, when you're spending more time worrying than living... ask yourself, "Is this getting me closer to where I want to be?" 

When you're avoiding doing the work... the early mornings, the long hours, the tough jobs, the hard conversations, the hustle - say, with conviction, "I am worthy of my dreams."

MOVING FORWARD

Self improvement, self acceptance. Love, compassion, vulnerability. Otherwise it never works. Accept and give yourself the permission and space to create authentic sense of success and fulfillment. Let go of the struggle. Forgive yourself (in other words - don't let your inner critic run the show). Give yourself a break. Take it one step at a time.

Believe in yourself, deeply. 

Danielle LaPorte's words ring true "When you believe in your value, you can accommodate more joy."

Choose joy. Take action.

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I hope these words touched you the way they needed to. Let me know - how will you be accommodating more joy in your life? I can't wait to hear from you. All shares and comments are appreciated xo 

image via jeffluker


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